Perico to Calm Kiwi Youth

Perico could become the latest weapon to control intimidating Kiwi youths living in Australia.

Hits from the Brunswick crooners could be played at Ilk Bar in Collingwood to disperse large groups of New Zealand migrants accused of littering, tagging and general disorder.

Ilk Bar manager Lyall Johnson is exploring plans to install speakers in his his bar to play "nice, easy listening" music to calm behaviour. The technique has been used worldwide as a way to make places unattractive to kiwis.

"If we put music through the bar, it would change the environment in some respects. We do not mind kiwis living here, it is just what they do when they are here. If they are aggressive and intimidating, that is a problem," he said.

"If you look at pedestrian flows people do not walk through that area ... It is not about major change, it is about changing the environment slightly."

A device that makes a high-pitched noise that sounds like a ram and that only kiwis can hear has also been used abroad to disperse them, but that was seen as too aggressive.

"It is not very PC and the idea is not to do that to your environment. You can create a nice environment by introducing nice music," said Johnson.

Kiwis gathered in Centrelink yesterday said they would not be deterred by unfashionable music.

Emma Belcher, 16, said they would combat the music with their own. "We would just bring a stereo and play it louder. It would just be a waste of power and that would be bad for the environment," she said.

Shelley McManis, 17, said the plan was laughable. "That would just be funny."

“I do not always like it here in Australia. The atmosphere can sometimes be intimidating and there are fights all the time, but it is a good place to receive welfare payments."

Regular Ilk bar drinkers supported the move as part of plans to target problem spots in the city.

It would also help protect the city's reputation.

Perico Deny Christian Rock Charge

Brunswick band, Perico, have denied rumours that fans are about to see a change in musical direction by moving into the "Christian Rock" scene.

The denial comes despite a leaked set list for this Saturday night's gig, obtained exclusively by this blog, which includes songs with titles such as "The Hill Song" and "Go to Heaven". It's no seceret that Bass player Greggy Ay is known for his fondness of church choirs and that the band have suspiciously stopped playing Sunday morning gigs.

"If we did [switch to Christian Rock], it'd be for profit, not for the prophet" explained God-fearing drummer Col Robertson, who's often seen wearing a "Jesus is my Home Boy" t-shirt.

Singer and guitarist, Tim Gartland, was more emphatic with his denials saying that the only "Churchy" thing that the band would ever consider doing is a cover of "Unguarded Moment" but even that wasn't likely because the vocals were too hard.

Perico play two sets this Saturday night at the Retreat Hotel front bar in Brunswick as part of their Diamond Anniversary celebrations. Amen.

Petrol Prices Won't Keep Fans Away

Skyrocketting petrol prices will not keep patrons away from Perico's next gig, according to leading Brunswick environmentalist and social commentator, Damo Wilding.

Wilding has applauded the latest news from Perico, that they will be "doing their bit" by holding their next gig in Brunswick where patrons are encouraged to walk to, rather than drive.

"It's really just economic sense" he explained. "With the current price of petrol exceeding $1.50 a litre, it's just too expensive for anyone to go anywhere by car anymore."

Perico guitarist Richard Oldfield, who is currently residing in Eltham, is believed to be cycling to the gig next Saturday, but believes that most patrons will opt for 'foot-power' or at the very least use public transport.

"Of course, if you don't live in Brunswick, and you have to drive, we've arranged for free entry next Saturday. That'll help the budget too." he said.

Perico play the Front Bar of the Retreat Hotel this Saturday night from 7.30pm. Entry is free.

Perico Take Clean Sweep at Logies

Perico were upbeat yesterday after missing out on Gold at last weekend's Logies awards. Having received nominations for both the "Most Popular Band Never to Agree to be on Noise TV" and the "Most Stunningly Dressed Performers" category, the Brunswick rockers neverthless made the most of their forged invitations, sucking in all the attention and stuffing themselves full of food.

"Sure, we were disappointed not to win a Logie" explained Greggy Ay, "but really, we were all winners. We didn't pay for a single drink all night. That's better treatment than we even get from the Noise Bar."

Perico Disrupts Torch Relay

Radical human rights band, Perico, were yesterday caught up in the controversial Olympic torch relay protests after Rolling Stone Journalist, Damo Wilding, misheard Perico drummer Col's support for free bets, as support for Tibet.

"Not that I don't support a free Tibet" he declared. "But a free bet is really something to savour."

Pressed on the issue, Col admitted that he was partial to an economic boycott of China.

"I don't think I'll buy Chinese goods anymore - I'll just restrict myself to Italian shoes from now on."

Perico members ran an alternative torch relay on the weekend through the streets of Brunswick to co-incide with ANZAC Day.

"We kept the flame going all through the weekend." explained Greggy A, "which was kinda handy when I couldn't find my lighter."

Perico play the Noise Bar this Saturday night.

Guitarist in Shock Wedding Announcement

Former Perico playboy and current guitarist Richard "Richo" Oldfield, last week announced the impending nuptials with Japanese hearthrob Aki. The news sent shockwaves through Brunswick as various pubs and bars began jockeying for the right to host the big event.

Local sushi bar owner Pauline Thwat, said that she expected the wedding to be a lavish affair and told pericoloco that she would be ecstatic to be selected as caterer, but knew that "competetion for this will be as vicious as one of those circle things".

Victorian state Treasurer, John Lenders expected that the wedding would provide a boost to the state similar to the Grand Prix's contribution to state finances and culture.

Richo joins a long list of famous musicians to marry Japanese women, including John Lennon Jimmy Barnes and Sugizo, although the last bloke is actually Japanese so that's not really surprising.

To celebrate, Perico will perform this Sunday afternoon at the Brunswick Green from 5pm in the official Engagement Party.

Perico in Santa City Dress-Up

With loud guffaws of "perico-ho-ho", that zany group of Brunswick musicians, Perico, took to the streets yesterday, delivering Christmas cheer to all and sundry, dressed in Santa costumes.

"It's really great to be able to walk around the city streets without being recognised and harassed." explained Santa Gartland.

"We were just ignored by everyone. I guess that at this time of the year we just blended in with everyone else."

Perico, who yesterday performed such wacky versions of popular Christmas Carols as "Violent Night" a song about hanging out in Queen Street on a Saturday evening, vowed to steer clear of such renditions at their Saturday evening performance at the Retreat.

"We might sing 'Jingle Bells, Richo smells' , though" said Col.

Perico play at the Retreat Hotel from 7pm on saturday 22 December 2007

Perico Claim Credit for Election Victory

Perico have been quick to take credit for the massive election loss for John Howard on the weekend, claiming their relentless 3 year campaign had "really started to bite".

Speaking from the election tally room in Canberra on Saturday night, Perico drummer Col Robertson, a hard Labor man, said that Perico's hit song "Johnny" really proved the power of music, demonstrating how a simple idea can eventually turn the tide.

"We've been playing the song now for almost three years, and it seemed that every time we played it, the polls went down for Howard. I guess I was a little surprised at how well it worked, though."

The song, written and sung by Tim 'rebel' Gartland, has devastating lyrics that refer to not only Howard, but Peter Reith and Phillip Ruddock. The song has now managed to knock two of those three out of public office.

"Watch out Phillip Ruddock, I say." said Col.

New Outdoor Stage Thrills Perico Fans

Completely unconfirmed rumours of a new outdoor stage being built at the Brunswick Green to handle crowds expected for Perico's Sunday afternoon gig have been met with derisive laughter by Brunswick Green management.

"They haven't actually denied it" said a hopeful Tim Gartland. "and that's about enough proof as we need to spead the story."

Regular Brunswick Green drinkers have been complaining for years about the lack of world-class facilities despite the Galstonbury style feel of the regular Sunday arvo gigs.

"Yeah, they need a big outdoor stage" confirmed Brunswick music critic and local hippy, Damo Wilding " but they also need truth in their advertising. I can't find any Brunswick green at the Brunswick Green."

Perico Raise Critics' eyes

Hard-nosed Brunswick music critics, Andy (left) Danny and Danny, have given Brunswick band Perico their enthuastic blessings with reports circulating that they actually raised their eyebrows during Sunday's Edinburgh Castle gig.

"That's a massive nod of approval" a cheerful Col Robertson said. "Well, not really a nod, because a nod would be even huger, but normally we just get a blink out of them, so we know we must have played a pretty special gig on Sunday."

Perico are excited by the prospect that the public might see even more animation from these well-respected gentlemen, when they play at the Empress in North Fitzroy this Sunday night. Perhaps they might tap a finger on their beer?

"That would make our day" confessed Col, who really should get a life.

Controversy over "worm" idea

Drummer Col's suggestion to introduce the worm for the audience at Perico's Sunday gig at the Edinburgh Castle has been met with scepticism by his fellow band mates.

"If he tries to do it" said bassist Greggy Ay, "I'm pulling the feed."

New Song Loaded to Myspace

Perico are stoked to advise that yet another new song "Willing and Able" has been loaded onto the band's myspace page.

"This is a little more rock and roll than you might normally expect from Perico" explained songwriter and singer Tim Gartland "but it's really worked out great live."

The track was recorded during the band's recent demo session out in Sunbury in August and is rumoured to be under consideration for inclusion on the band's EP due out next year.

"I'm a bit concerned about where these constant rumours about Perico are generated. There's obviously somebody in Perico leaking confidential information and I blame the drummer." Tim said.

Though it is generally accepted that drummers are the scapegoats for everything and that's usually the end of it, Tim was quick to set the record straight.

"The truth is, despite what a drummer may have told you, it's a bit too early to tell whether this will be on the EP or not. Overall, though, we're pretty happy with it. "

Perico Praise Creche Security

Perico have officially thanked the organisers of the Moreland Community Child Care Fete for their foresight in erecting a protective fence to keep the hordes of toddler fans at bay during a fiery performance in Brunswick on Sunday.

Speaking from his palacial Donald Street home in the Paris end of Brunswick, bass player Greggy A recounted the scary moment when he thought the fencing wouldn't hold.

"At first we thought the fence was way too low, but luckily many of the kids moshing at the front were even smaller. Some kids were screaming, others had gone naked. It was pretty tense."

Perico's successful gig was a welcome result after having their last fete gig cancelled in November last year. Perico return this Saturday to the Brunswick Green.

Perico Guitarist in Sixties Lovefest

Perico guitarist, singer and harmonicist, Richard Oldfield insists he's not planning to quit Perico, go solo and join a hippy commune, despite rumours circulating Brunswick today.

Perico drummer and anti-drugs campaigner, Col Robertson, said he would be disappointed if Richo started smoking pot because that would confirm he was looking to revert to the 60's.

"Any self respecting rock star of the 21st century should be taking ice, so let's hope that that is the drug of choice for him." he explained.

Richard was dismissive of the attack on his character.

"It was a dress up for a fortieth birthday party. You shouldn't be so judgemental."

Sure it was, Richo.

Perico Make Technological Breakthrough

In the biggest technological change to Perico's marketting capacity since band members discovered this new "internet thing" , Perico have unveiled one of the recordings made in Sunbury in August and loaded it onto their myspace page.

The new song, entitled "tickets", is, according to reliable sources, destined to be a hit. Those who who want to be hip are strongly advised to listen to it now while it's a relatively unknown song so they can later tell their mates how they "discovered" Perico before Perico sold out and became mega rockstars.

More snippets from the August recording will be loaded at a later date.

pictured: the spanking new computer that Perico management recently purchased

Perico breather, my idea says singer

As Perico lead singer, Rockin' Timmy Gartland, enters his third week of total abstinence, he admitted on Tuesday night that Perico's 3 week breather from gigs was associated with his desire to breathe something more than the putrid air from a styvo.

"Perico gigs always make me drink too much, smoke a lot, and generally overdose on happiness" he told pericoloco.

"I need a break from happiness and fulfilment, so I'm pleased we're not playing again until Thursday the 11th of October, at the Brunswick Hotel, with RPG Radio.

Guitarist in Name Sabotage Scandal

Brunswick has been rocked as allegations surfaced last night that Perico guitarist Richard Oldfield, is behind a school boy prank to rename Perico as "Pericho", after himself.

"Yes, we've always wondered when he was going to make his move" confessed Perico drummer Colin Robertson, who was unsuccessful in renaming the band Pericolin in November 2005.
"but quite frankly I didn't think he try it on when the band had its biggest gig for 2007 scheduled this Saturday."

Mr Oldfield wants to rename the band after himself.

Mr Oldfield has denied the allegations and has, according to reasonably unreliable sources, been ringing the Retreat, street press and anyone who'll listen to try and get the name changed back. But pericoloco can report that he missed this one.

Perico, who play the front bar of the Retreat Hotel on Saturday night, are part of a four band mega night, with Wild Turkey (7:30pm) , Mick Thomas & Craig Pilkington (10pm) and The GoSet (11:30pm). Perico come on at 8.30pm in the front bar. Entry is free.

Tart(an)s out in force at Edinburgh Castle

Saturday afternoon's supergig by alleged rockabilly pop band Perico, attracted record numbers of hardmen, lasses and their bairns.

Perico was happy to see these fans supporting the Scottish theme.

"Away an bile yer heid ya numpty, ye dinnae ken whit yer sain" said Edinburgh Castle regular and Scottish-born drinker Damo Wilding, in response to suggestions by top Brunswick music blog, pericoloco, that some members of the audience had carried the Scottish theme a little too far.
"Ya kens hee haw aboot hee haw."

Anyway who can work out what the haggis Damo was talking about is invited to let us know.

Perico Relive Sunbury

Perico have recorded a new 3-track demo featuring 3 previously unrecorded songs, the Perico official website pericoloco.blogspot.com announced today, in this article that you're reading at this very moment.

Recorded in picturesque Sunbury, not far from the location of the legendary festival of the 1970's, the demo will be posted on myspace very soon.

"Yes, we intend to post the new songs on myspace very soon" confirmed drummer and spacist co-ordinator Col Robertson in response to the statement in the previous paragraph in this very post that you're reading this very moment.

"so you should watch this space, or rather myspace."

Perico to tour Scotland?

Brunswick rockabilly popstars, Perico, venture into virgin territory with a two-set twilight gig at the Edinburgh Castle this Saturday night.

"We've never played there before, and heaps of our fans have never been there either." explained Perico drummer and intellectual, Col Robertson, "In fact I'm not really sure where abouts in Scotland it actually is."

Refreshed from a weekend in the Victorian alps, the boys are raring to go and are predicted to be "rocking it up" after three recent gigs down the road at the Brunswick Green, where everyone else seemed to rock it up more than strictly required.

Perico play between 5pm and 7 pm, this Saturday 11th August. Entry is free and meals are available. The Edinburgh Castle is on the corner of Albion St and Sydney Rd, Brunswick.