Perico in Steamy Threesome

Brunswick superstars, Perico, last night held their first post-Tim practice in their new look threesome set-up.

"We're going to sound a bit different, but don't worry, we'll still being playing some of the old faves" pin-up guitarist Richo reassures.

"You'll hear a whole host of new songs too."

Drum-smoking drummer Col, was just happy to be able to claim more influence within the band.

"The way I see it, my votes in the band have increased from 25% to 33.3%, and that extra 8 and 1/3 percent represents an improvement of 8 and 1/3 percent. I just need one other member of the band to agree with me and I have a 2/3 majority, which would allow me to change the constitution."

When it was pointed out that everyone else had also increased their "votes" by 8 and 1/3 percent and that they also needed only one person to agree with them to hold 2/3 of the votes, and that there was, in fact, no constitution to change anyway, Col became agitated.

"This press conference is over. No more questions." he said before storming out.

Drummer Finds Respect in Malaysia

Perico Drummer, Big Col, on a fact finding mission to Malaysia, has reported that drummer discrimination is not only markedly lower in Malaysia than in Australia, but quite possibly doesn't exist at all.

"Everyone here seems to respect drummers" said Col by phone yesterday from the luxury Nexus resort in Kota Kinabalu.

"I tell all the locals here, or at least the one's who serve me food and drink or clean my room, that I'm a drummer and they smile at me. This is in stark contrast to the reaction I get from others like tourists or even my wife who just look at me like I'm sub-human.

"In Malaysia you can be a drummer and be respected!"

Perico in Nude Photo Session

Perico played 2 gigs last weekend and we've got some photos for you to look at. OK, they're not nude photos, that would be obscene and Perico prides itself on its good wholesome family values*, but they're photos nonetheless.

*Note: Wholesome family values does NOT refer to a KFC family value pack.

$6 Million Perico Man

An exclusive interview with Perico last night revealed:

• Perico glockenspielist, pin-up boy and Churchill fan Richo, believes that "this is not the end, it is not even the beginning of the end, it is merely..."
• Bassist, intellectual and paranoid pyscology enthusiast, Professor Greg Aronson denied everything, demanding "why are you asking me these questions?"
• Drummer and chick-magnet Col, compared the plight of Perico to astronought Steve Austin before the US Government invested $6 million on him. "Gentelmen, we can rebuild Perico. We have the technology. We have the capability of making the world's first bionic band. We can make Perico better than it was before. Better. Stronger. Faster."

The new bionic Perico will be making an appearance in May.

Perico Closing Ceremony Surpasses Mel2006

Sunday arvo's "Closing Ceremony" at the Vic easily surpassed that other ceremony happening in Melbourne the same night.

Perico, before a loyal crowd of followers, delivered two complete sets, totalling 17 original songs and 3 covers. It was a fitting tribute to lead man Tall Tim, who takes a sabbatical for an indefinite period, while the Loyal 3 continue on in the Perico name.

The gig was also filmed and footage will be available for view and/or download shortly from this website.

Pictured is the fireworks display put on by Perico management, outside the Vic on Sunday.

Balmy Night Draws Heated Crowd

Friday night's 5- band bonanaza at the Brunswick Hotel, headlined by Brunswick super-group Perico, was packed out by a bizarre mix of sweaty teenagers, frustrated New Zealanders and "quite a few Poms".

Undoubtedly the most bizarre part of the crowd was bass player Greg Aronson's personal fan club, whose ecstatsy at listening to their hero's sweet musical skills could only have been surpassed if he'd actually kicked his gear off and danced around nude.

Click here for more photos of Friday night.

Perico: We're No John Farnham

Brunswick rockers, Perico, have reacted warily to suggestions that advertising for their two "final" gigs this weekend is misleading, untruthful and frankly "just like John Farnham".

"I don't think we should be put in the same sentence or even phrase as that wonderful Australian icon" said singer Tim, whose imminent departure overseas is the catatlyst for the two "farewell" shows.

"I'm actually more like General Macarthur or Arnie Schwarzneger. I'll be back" he said.

"Ok, it's true, I'm leaving on a jet plane and don't know when I'll be back again. I guess that's the power of love, but I still haven't found what I'm looking for."

Rumours of a guest appearance by John Farnham himself at the Brunswick Hotel on Friday night have been greatly exaggerated.

U2 out: Perico in

Fuel has been added to recent reports circulating about U2 being replaced by Brunswick Rockers Perico when they announced two gigs for the weekend 24-26 March.

On the night of Friday 24th March, Perico take to the stage at the Brunswick Hotel on the corner of Weston St and Sydney Rd, Brunswick. They'll be playing with fellow Wicksters Crazy Like a Fox. (pictured above at the Sydney Rd Street Party last week)

In the arvo of Sunday 26th March, Perico will play 2 sets at the Victoria Hotel, Victoria St, Brunswick.

Both gigs are FREE, which is a lot less than the cost of a U2 ticket.

PERICO AFRICAN MOVE?.

Perico spokesperson Big Col today announced that the band was considering moving to Burkina Faso after the recent success of their latest album in the countrys capital Ouagadougou.

The song 'coffee or Kofi' is reportedly a hit at all of the local discos and young middle class in Ouagadougou can often be seen sporting the latest Perico t-shirt. Local radio announcer Jabooti said the song resonated with the young kids who are struggling to come to terms with their lives in this strife-torn country.

"Particularly the chorus of 'coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee ..no milk please' really gets them going" Jabooti said.

For Big Col the move to Burkina Faso would be a positive step for the band.

"Look we just take one country at a time but whether it's Glenroy or Ouagadougou we are all humans and we all have needs and we all seek spiritual guidance as well as wanting to be better people".

When asked to clarify what this meant Big Col simply shrugged his shoulders and smiled and said "rock and roll man its all rock and roll".

Concerned parents criticise PERICO

A new Brunswick parents group called 'Parents opposed to organised parties (POOP)' has criticised the band Perico after a concert held yesterday as part of the Sydney Road festival got out of hand.

Spokesperson for POOP Mr Jock Peterson said that the band had incited youngsters to throw away their nappies as a gesture against the imperialist capitalist roader parents. According to Mr Peterson lead singer Tim had screamed "dance nude" and 'drink more milk' as the band played a heavy metal version of Wiggles song 'Dorothy the dinosaur'.

"It was completely irresponsible and could have been dangerous if one of the children had an accident" Mr Peterson said. "As a parent and rate payer I believe the council has a responsibility to stop this sort of thuggery".

"It was mayhem there were little bums exposed everywhere. It was like Woodstock for juniors".

"I certainly won't be taking my children along to another of these disgraceful hippy gatherings".

Band spokesperson big Col denied the band had incited the trouble. Big Col claimed that certain trouble makers in the audience were definitely drinking something stronger than milk "perhaps even ribena".

Venue Change was our Idea: Perico

Perico's management deny rumours at yesterday's press conference

Perico's management have moved quickly to quell rumours that the change of venue for Sunday's Street Party performance was forced upon the band by embarrassed street party organisers.

"Due to circumstances totally within their control, Perico have agreed to display their awesome musical talents outside Brunswick's latest hip shop 1+1=3=8 rather than at the Rosario's car park." the band said in a prepared statement yesterday.

"The street party organisers have had NOTHING to do with this decision. The descison to move is made entirely for artistic purposes.

Perico will be playing at 4pm outside funky new t-shirt shop 1+3=8 located both geographically and spiritually between the Brunswick Green and the Youth Stage on Albert Street.

Perico AWB Link

The Cole Commission into the wheatboard bribes scandal took another turn today when it was alleged by senior trade offcials that soft rock band PERICO had taken kickbacks for their song Party with Australian Chapati.

Solicitor Greg Baskin for the AWB claimed that the bands spokesperson Big Col had agreed to the lines I only party with Australian made chapati for a years free supply of donuts from the caravan at the Victoria market. Mr Col declined to comment this morning about the allegations claiming he had jam stains on his drum kit to clean .

Aussie Rockers Scorned by Womens Groups

(Thurs, Feb 2006 Rolling Stone)
Soft rockers Perico are in hot water today after the head of the Australian Womens Electoral Lobby, Judith Burbank, denounced them as unreconstructed, sexist and out dated.

Burbank claimed the bands new song One eyed trouser sausage lover was demeaning to women, children, the poor, migrants, the aged, religious groups as well as anyone who owns a car over five years old.

"It reeks of patriarchal oppression with lines like 'don't go undercover, my little one eyed trouser sausage lover, feel heat, don't you pause, put it on some bread with sauce.' " she said.

Band spokesperson Big Col denied the song was sexist or oppressive, however he did admit that vegetarians may be offended but "they can piss off back to Northcote where they belong". A spokesperson from the Northcote residents Association could not be contacted for comment.

Perico Defies Organisers to Rock Street Party

Due to overwhelming popular demand, and despite official rejection by the Sydney Road Street Party organisers, Perico are proud to announce their sanction-busting Super Street Party gig for 2006.

Denied the right to perform on the "official stages" by Street party Organisers, whose lame excuses included "you're too old for the children's stage" and "we can't afford you this year", Perico instead take to the "Car Park" stage, next to Rosario's near the corner of Glenlyon Rd and Sydney Rd.

Perico will be bookended by Brunswick's best DJs and come on at 4pm.

Perico denies slave labour link

Aging rock band Perico today lashed out at union accusations that their t-shirts were made in sweat shops in China. Spokesperson Big Col said the rumour was a slur on the band, all of whom are religious and ignores the great work they have done in the third world (Pascoe Vale, Preston) in the last year.

"In fact they are made in India by children so I wish these people would get their facts right" an angry Col stated at a press conference today. "It makes me sick, we are trying to help the unemployed children in India and all these people do is behave un Australian"

"It is another example of cutting down the tall poppies, the same way they slag off Rove McManus and Shannon Noll " Big Col said.

Perico Blasted by Police

Soft rock group Perico were today blasted by Police.

It is alleged that leader singer Tim 'the tool' Gartland smiled during their set on Sunday night at the Railway Hotel in Brunswick. Senior Sergeant Jack Off from Brunswick station claimed that Mr Gartland showed his teeth whilst singing the bands controversial current hit song and pro refugee anthem 'Pamper the Tampa'.

Mr Gartland was taken into custody after the gig but released without charges after giving an assurance that he wouldn't repeat the offence.

"Man it's the first time its happened, we all make mistakes and I know I have let down fellow lead singers and the band by my actions" Mr Gartland said.

Though Gartland was relieved not to be charge by the Police it is believed that further action could be taken after the Lead Singers Union of Australia (LSUA) were flooded with complaints following the gig.

The Boys do Noise

The last three songs at Sunday's Perico gig at the Railway were filmed for Noise TV before the boys were whisked away for an interview of hard-hitting questions and intelligent responses.

We don't have any idea when or if the footage and interview will be shown, but promise to keep our many dedicated readers of this blog well informed.


Pictured, above, is a television, which Perico may appear on at some stage.

Perico Plays Railway

This Sunday, 19th February, Perico return to the railway Hotel (Noise Bar) on Albert Street, Brunswick. The boys have been "countrying up" recently and should produce a somewhat different set to previous gigs.

Perico start at 3pm and play only a short set of 40 minutes or so. Entry is free.

Perico Warms Up for Big Day Out

Perico set the tone for the Big Day Out weekend by performing a scintillating set at the Brunswick Hotel on Friday night in front of a packed audience. This was the first time the band had performed since November but didn't appear rusty at all.

Follwing Perico were the recently renamed "Crazy Like a Fox" whose rock 'n roll set was the perfect warm-up for what promises to be a big day on Sunday.

Back to Brunswick this Friday

Perico continue their extensive tour of Brunswick, returning to the stage this Friday (27.01) at the Brunswick Hotel. Supporting local garage blues rock legends "The artists formally known as Goldenhour".

Entry is free and Perico hit the stage around 10.

The Brunswick is at corner Sydney Road and Weston Street, Brunswick.